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Welcome to Blame Denial. Feel free to look around and read whatever you like, when you like and take it how you like! The primary purpose of this site is to express my experience and views of Alcoholics Anonymous and the effect it has on its members both past and present.
Letters:
Page 1 : Page 2 : Page 3 : Page 4 : Page 5 : Page 6 : Page 7 : Page 8 : Page 9 : Page 10 : Page 11 : Page 12 : Page 13
The latest letters are posted on: Page 14 Updated 21/09/08
And now letters Page 15 Updated 30/11/08
Use the links above to navigate yourself around the site.
30/01/2009 - Minor Update:
I feel as though I should explain why I have made so few posts or videos recently. I sense I have said all that I can, for now, regarding the 12 Steps. My life has changed so much since I left the program and now I want to get on and continue to reach my potential elsewhere. That is not to say I have lost my passion for exposing XA for what it is; all it means is that I have reached the point where I have nothing further to add.
The site will remain online, as will all of my videos, for the foreseeable future. Should Mike (or anyone else) come up with further ideas I will happily produce them. However I will not be making any more updates to the website including the letters page.
The Orange Papers remains the most thorough investigation of AA available on the Internet, closely followed by Morerevealed.com. I would advise all of you to visit them, and if you have already done so, to revisit them.
In some respects the strongest message I can send out is that having challenged AA I am still able to live a fulfilling life. So now I shall get on and do that, although to be fair to myself, I already have!
I appreciate I have announced my departure a couple of times before but this time it is not the result of a reaction. This decision is entirely my own and it feels as though the time is right.
Many thanks,
J
Youtube Member Accuses Me of Harming People
How Dare You Challenge AA...
12 Step Free:
Yes I have opted to leave the online forum that is 12 Step Free.
There are a multitude of reasons for this, but I decided it would be best to vote with my feet during a relatively quiet time. This way my actions can be seen as genuine, as opposed to a knee jerk reaction to any particular hostility.
Please see the link above for more info.
Regards,
J
PS I shall continue to include a link to Morerevealed at the end of my videos. I admire the work of Ken Ragge, as I always have done.
Take Back Control of Alcoholics Anonymous
A post I made in response to some criticism for the above video:
Am I a member of AA? I suppose that depends how you view the Third Tradition – as far as I am concerned, being the coauthor of this video, I regard myself as a member of AA although I have not been to a meeting in over a year. After all, the Steps, attending meetings, getting a sponsor, etc are all suggestions. I set up Blamedenial because I felt I could not challenge from within, but that does not mean because I have resorted to a more public display of disproval that I should then automatically be seen as being outside AA.
Does it really matter where the criticism comes from if it ultimately proves to be valid? Believe it or not I do care about the people that make up AA; they are not AA; they are individuals. I place their welfare above any group – suggesting that the lives of alcoholics depend on the survival of AA is utter rubbish – a thing many hardcore members do. The tragedy of this lie is that as soon as it is believed any chance of change within AA is seriously stifled. When I set up my site and published my first video I did so with the hope of promoting some real, and not to mention, much needed change for the program. Unfortunately what resulted was a year wasted defending myself rather than debating any notion of change. I have grown so bored of it I have now opted to stay away from forums and instead just release my videos, only engaging with those who I feel genuinely harbour the same primary concern as me; the welfare of each and every individual addict/alcoholic.
I do not really understand what the issue is with adding those links to the end of our video. I believe in people, including alcoholics, and with that I have enough faith in their ability to decipher what is true, or useful, from that which is untrue, and potentially dangerous, to them. What I flatly refuse to do is make their minds up for them by controlling what information they may or not be exposed to. I would argue that the people with the most questionable agendas are those that question anyone who is trying to inform, where the alternative can only be an expectation to conform. If AA is to survive what I am pretty sure is a silent but powerful revolution taking place on line, it needs to learn first to listen and second to respect the views of people whether they are considered in or out of the program. The welfare of alcoholics has to come first, not that of alcoholics in AA alone. Anything else would be blatantly self-serving to the organisation that calls itself AA; one, I might add, that claims its primary purpose is to help the alcoholic that still suffers.
J
Founder of http://www.blamedenial.co.uk
N E W S:
30/11/08 - Latest Letter/s - more to follow
Forum Post Re: Gossip in AA Film - 11/11/08
17/07/08 I have added some of my more interesting forum posts and letters to my Random page.
11/07/08 So you're questioning AA? (With comments from Ken Ragge and Agent Orange.)
07/07/08 Debate with a Youtube user here.
07/07/08 My Thoughts on the Chapter How Far Carried in The Real AA by Ken Ragge
U P D A T E D 27/05/08 Introducing Blamedenial's latest contributor: Rachelle
Added my essay on Flip-flopping and leaving the rooms in response to a post at 12SF.
19/06/08 - The first part of my response to Agent Green
12/06/08 - Possible case against treatment centres in contract law
04/06/08 - Statement regarding my position with Blamedenial
13/05/08 A Letter to Treatment Centres in the UK from Blamedenial.co.uk: here
U P D A T E D 18/05/08 Mike has now added some more posts and a new video: here
I have been really impressed with some of the posts at Xsteppers lately - If you have not already joined, I'd highly recommend it.
New essay on the topic of US drug legislation now available here.
An interesting document exposing how one member on the board of AA's trustees was paid $218,814 (see pg. 7) - I thought AA was not for profit and was a charity?
I have made a new Intro for the site although I am unlikely to make proper use of it - here.
Blamedenial is looking for guest writers – if you are interested please contact jamesg .
For a list of topics I am researching click here.
Confession Session; the videos page is open again - updated 18/03/08.
Featured Video: From Akron with Love
People keep asking me why I don't just leave AA and let it help people: here are my reasons:
One of the most enthusiastic boosters of Alcoholics Anonymous, Professor George Vaillant of Harvard University, who is also a member of the Board of Trustees of Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. (AAWS), showed by his own 8 years of testing of A.A. that A.A. was worse than useless -- that it didn't help the alcoholics any more than no treatment at all, and it had the highest death rate of any treatment program tested -- a death rate that Professor Vaillant himself described as "appalling". While trying to prove that A.A. treatment works, Professor Vaillant actually proved that A.A. kills. (Nevertheless, Vaillant is still a Trustee of AAWS, and he still wants to send all alcoholics to A.A. anyway, to "get an attitude change by confessing their sins to a high-status healer." That is cult religion, not the treatment of alcoholism.) (Retrieved here.)
WELCOME
You may have ended up here for any number of reasons, but the chances are you fall into one of two camps. Either you believe AA is a good organisation which does our society a service, or you don’t. It will not take you long to realise that my views on AA are mixed, and as such fall into the latter bracket. The initial reaction from the majority of people I speak to is that I serve no purpose by challenging and questioning something that is perceived as helping millions of people recover from alcoholism. I have to disagree. Even if I am wrong, which I am quite happy to accept I might be, I still have these concerns, along with many others, about AA. When I first contemplated making my concerns public, I spent quite some time considering the consequences of expressing these views. Resistance to them was inevitable, but that did not worry me. What made me really think, was the belief that has been instilled in me by membership to AA, that questioning this program openly may contribute to another person’s relapse, and thus death. That would make any compassionate human being think, and think I did. I reached the conclusion that it was more dangerous for a society to silence people who want to question the status quo, than it was for me to actually question it. There appears to be a deep rooted fear amongst both members and non-members of AA to challenge the program. What is so awful about asking a few questions, expressing a point of view and challenging anything which is trusted with the lives of so many people? The mere fact that what I am doing causes such a reaction concerns me more than anything else. The attempts to silence me with so-called ‘facts’ are astounding. If I was to set up a website that challenged the effectiveness of any other health provider, I am sure the reaction would not be so extreme.
When in dialogue with people who have been in AA or are still in AA, the conversations are usually more rational than those that have never been, for the simple reason they have some experience to base their conclusions on. Those who have never been to an AA meeting are more likely to assume that AA is good and thus regard what I am saying and doing as destructive. When I have suggested there may be flaws within AA, the knee-jerk reaction is that it helps people. I find this intriguing and I would love to hear from anyone who has arrived at this site who has never been a member of AA. Why do so many people see what I am saying as such a threat? After all, challenging something can also have the effect of reinforcing its usefulness. I have my opinions, but none of them are fixed. I believe in being open-minded; I believe in being challenged; I believe in scrutiny; I believe in those methods of reaching the truth – I don’t believe in using them as modes to prove anything, but rather as a method of discovery. If by the end of all this I have proved that AA is good for us as a society, then I will be just as happy as I would be to prove the opposite. Some might argue that my views are clear on AA, and they are, but they are open. I am taking the risk of making them available for the precise reason I invite challenge. I do not want to suffer from contempt, nor admiration, prior to investigation. I am not frightened of people telling me I might be wrong; to the contrary I encourage it. I want to be put the kind of questions that will either prove or disprove what I am saying. All I ask is that these questions do not contain assumptions. Let’s use this site to go back to the drawing board, to have a proper look at AA and its program and reach a healthy conclusion backed up by a thorough investigation. The results may help or hinder AA, but ultimately they can only serve the alcoholic (or addict) - the very people AA tells us it strives to help.
If you are a member of AA this is a place where you can express your concerns. I know how hard this is to do in the rooms, or with friends in AA. If I had been able to do this without being made to feel uncomfortable then I would have challenged AA from within.
One member sent me an email recently asking me to come back to AA for AA’s sake and not my own. Whilst I was touched by his request, I explained that at the moment the evidence would suggest that the practices within AA mean that it will never change, regardless of what I can prove or not. This might be our chance to do just that, but only if we sincerely practice honesty, open-mindedness and willingness. Before we challenge anything, we have to challenge ourselves, our assumptions and our beliefs.
J
J can be contacted at j@blamedenial.co.uk